ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS
YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING
NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED
IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGES
thanks for the tip karkat
SERIOUSLY THIS SHIT IS AMAZING AND IF YOU DON’T HAVE CANOLA YOU CAN USE OLIVE FUCKING BELIEVE ME AND MY FINE ASS LEGS
" your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic" I AM LAUGHING WAY TOO HARD
Don’t fuck with me
This is great. You were very mature and explicit, as well as helpful in the ways that you could be. I don’t think you could have handled this any better than you did. 4 for you, Glen Coco.
I wish I could have stood up for myself in this way when I was a teenager
Threatening suicide to get what you want isn’t “borderline” abusive, it is abusive.
Men who do this have a very high risk of murdering whomever they’re trying to guilt trip when the guilt trip eventually stops working.
ironically hes joked about killing me before
The action figures you can choose from are Captain America or Iron Man—which super mega blows, since the 3DPlusMe machine at cons also produces MODOK and Black Widow figures. Black Widow is even visible on the 3DPlusMe website. I mean, sure, I could head to a Walmart and have my face slapped on an Iron Man doll (boom! Lady Iron Man). But for countless young girls out there who love Black Widow, who love The Avengers, who saw Guardians of the Galaxy a bunch of times because Gamora is so awesome, *representation is important*. The whole point of this project is to literally put your face onto a superhero; to be able to envision yourself as a hero, to immerse yourself in that narrative. Marvel, Hasbro, and 3DPlusMe are telling girls that, unless they want to become traditionally male characters, they don’t get to be superheroes. That’s for boys. Safe to say, I’m pretty sick of this shit.You Can Get A Marvel Action Figure Made With Your Face At Walmart. Unless You Want A Female Character, Of Course. (via themarysue)
Valid criticisms of tumblr social justice:
- Inordinate focus on US centric social issues, with little to no acknowledgement that race relations are very different elsewhere
- Little to no acknowledgment of the global issue of classism
- Radfem exclusion of trans women
- General exclusion of trans men
- All the “tucute” garbage
- Ignoring/contributing to the issue of antisemitism
- Perpetuating the idea that all anime characters are white for some reason, what even is that
- General unwillingness to call out problematic behavior/trolls among other SJWs
- Extremely narrow focus on the issues of mental illness, favoring a select few while largely ignoring the rest
- A general attitude of unforgiveness, believing people can’t change for the better, and any possible slipup makes you an irredeemable monster, forcing everyone to walk on eggshells too terrified to make mistakes rather than learn from them
Invalid criticisms of tumblr social justice:
- Pretty much anything that isn’t on that list
I know you don’t like to talk, but you gotta do it for her.
This arc took a total of three scenes in the season (four if you count the scene where she’s not in the visiting room) and it still carried more weight than everything Larry’s dealt with the entire series.
this guy is like 50000x more important than Larry.